This is not the revolution

As of today I have met with 40 HIV victims for counseling and/or needs assessment. I'm also working Saturday and Monday, so I will meet with about 50 overall. That is about half of the total members, as there are close to 100 now.

For my last week, we have been doing home visits. It adds another dimension to see the actual living space of the people I'm working with. Of about 15 home visits, only two have had a home with more than one room. Nobody complains about that though. This is just the reality here. If you have more than one room you're living large.

I finished doing the needs assessment last week and have been doing counseling ever since. Once Flora saw a few counseling sessions she told me, "you do counseling from now on." I'm happy it's going well because at first I was doubting I would be able to do much in the way of counseling. The counseling usually isn't as intense as you might imagine it to be. For one thing, it's short-term, so I have to keep the scope small and usually focus on just one issue. Here is an example - one woman worries constantly about where her next meal will come from. After talking, I realize she almost never goes a day without eating, although she sometimes has to go with just one meal. The kids always get at least two meals. There are two facts that dictate how I handle this situation: 1) she provides for herself and her children well enough to survive and stay relatively healthy and 2) there are absolutely no resources available to provide more food. Since the situation can't change, the focus is on how she thinks about the situation. She typically goes through the day constantly thinking, "where am I going to get food" and "what if I can't eat today?" Obviously very stressful. I suggest that when she has those thoughts she remind herself, "I almost never go a day without eating, but when I do I'm okay. I alway find enough to survive." As you can see, this is not some revolutionary change, just something that will help her cope better in a situation where there is no solution.

Another woman is very lonely since her husband died of AIDS and her children are away at school. She is isolated from her neighbors because they know she has HIV and she is stigmatized. She loves the Saturday support group though. She usually feels good for a day or two after the meeting. She stated that she wished they met two days per week, so I asked her to start talking about it with other members to see if anyone is interested. She talked to Flora about it right after talking to me and now she's taking the initiative to start a second meeting. There seems to be a lot of interest for another meeting, so I think she has a good chance of being successful. She seemed very happy after finding out there might be a second meeting and that she would be the one to set it up.

Then there is the woman I mentioned before who seems to have lost hope. Unfortunately I'm not here long enough to help her overcome that. My focus is to get her to rely more on the group for support. She's relatively new and hasn't really given it a chance yet. I am confident they can help her find some hope if she will let them. I think she is open to trying.

I can't believe I'm only a few days away from coming home. I feel like I've been here for months, but in a good way. I've seen and experienced a lot for such a short period of time. I wish I had a few more weeks.